Some people enter your life, touch you with their hearts and then leave, sometimes to move a little farther away to their own space and occasionally very far. Sometimes it's just a bye, a shake hands and not much more. And once in a while it's a farewell forever where the perfume of a departure lingers on till one's own self says goodbye.

Shahidul (Alam) bid goodbye to me twice. The first time, I encouraged him to do so and once he went without exchanging a few final words of parting with any of us. We had been colleagues at BRAC's Advocacy department for several years before he informed me that he was leaving to start up his own outfit along with a few friends. They had all been working for long and decided to get their act together and start their own shop.

I like this spirit a lot and not being fond of hanging on to jobs encouraged him. I was very happy and so were our young colleagues who had worked with him. Yet at the same time the farewell tea we had for him was poignant because everyone was sad to see him go. He was one of the most loved people and colleagues we have ever had.

The Group

Shahidul and his friends, including Masrur who works for Channel I, together set up a low key but very effective joint. It was well respected and delivered its assignment successfully. And it made no noise while it did so. When I would listen to them discuss their various plans and assignments, I would often be reminded of Shahidul's own personality. Just deliver the assignment with a smile and without any dhamaka and move on.

His groups gained a positive reputation and were very well considered by many. So when I was approached by an international agency to work on "Prevention Of Extremism and Development Of Peace Initiatives". I immediately recommended them. I did it because if integrity was an issue then Shahidul and his team would qualify immediately because it had it more than most. I believe that sums up Shahidul more than all other words.

His health shock

Several years back I suddenly heard from his friends that he was seriously unwell. It was a shock because we had met a few days back and shared a ride. Shahidul was asking me about my Canadian citizenship issue and when he learnt that I had refused he was very happy. My stock went up in his eyes. Later I posted on FB saying I had only one citizenship, Bangladesh. He responded with a barrage of love emojis.

I was worried about his health but it was nothing compared to the shock I received when I heard it was a brain tumor. I heard he had had headaches and some memory issues and all that but nothing earth shaking. I was seriously down when I heard the dismal news. However, he had an operation and survived but was severely unwell for weeks. Masrur informed me of his health regularly and that he had survived was an enormous relief.

My first conversation after his operation was wonderful for me because I hadn't expected him to survive. We talked with cheer and relief and he mentioned that he was keen to return to work. I cheered him on. But I was also aware that it could recur and after all the trauma of a cancer, it doesn't let go easily. Sometimes a little inch of malignancy escapes and then returns as a killing assassin. I knew that and I think he did too.

He did return to some work in a limited way but our conversations on phone were cheerful. I knew Shahidul wanted to assure me that everything was fine though it wasn't. I carried that anxiety all the time knowing that his cancer could return.

The ending...

Perhaps it never went away and he did have a second operation but his decline was on. I would track his Facebook account to try to track his condition and call our colleague Farzana Sultana Dina to inquire. It was never any good news and bracing oneself for the inevitable was always there. Farzana would inform me that his devoted wife looked after him like none before and if anything he had lived for the extra time it was largely because she took such care of him.

One day Farzana informed that he had lapsed into a coma and the family was informing their relatives that his time on earth was short. When Masrur's call came one morning I didn't have to pick up the phone to know what it was about.

So there you are Shahidul, gone I hope to a place which is as wonderful as the person you were. You were like a lovely breeze that blew through the windows of our heart, a perfumed breeze whose breath we shall carry till our own time comes.

Farewell and best wishes