The first time someone helped me cross the street was in 2012. I had recently returned from Canada and Dhaka seemed a bit strange as I was walking the lanes, alleys and byways of Dhaka like never after a long time.

But they seemed strange and a trifle intimidating. It wasn't just that Toronto spoils walkers as crossing the road is electronically controlled and violators are almost none due to extreme punishment potential. I had also lost touch with my feet. I had been on a vehicle since 2002 and so walking wasn't what I did for work or exploration. I was a car guy to put it mildly. And then I returned to Dhaka and without a car or Canada I had to take to the streets. It was fun but also called for courage to negotiate the streets.

First assisted crossing

I was coming from Badda which wasn't so densely housed as its now and landed near the ex-DCC market at around 9. I was living in my brother's company's guest house for free so life was ok in many ways for someone with almost no money.

I was enjoying being back but the inner streets' traffic flow of rickshaws, CNG, thela gari and occasional cars got me. I stood there hesitating, picking up courage to cross without getting hit when I realized the rickshaw wallah who had just dropped me, took my arm with a smile and said, "Let me help you."

I know how it feels. I was sixty years old and he was probably fifty -not too big a gap but his heart was bigger than mine. I didn't need his help but I truly, deeply appreciated and enjoyed what he did. It's what Dhaka/Bangladesh is made of.

Twelve years later I have developed a serious problem crossing roads and streets.

Roads at 72

And now I am 72 and the roads have become seriously angry with walkers. I had an office transport from 2012 to 2017 when I was with BRAC and then again returned to public transport or walking. I enjoy that far more than travelling by car. It's just that motor vehicles nowadays are much more allergic to people crossing the road at any time, particularly those using zebra crossings. Why? Aren't they supposed to be used for that? Well no, not if you aren't a zebra.

In the days during and after Covid I have taken to the road regularly partly because I enjoy walking and partly for health and find the streets and even pavements unruly and safe. And if you are a senior, you really are in a high discomfort zone if not trouble. In the last few years the streets have somehow become more fierce and unyielding as if the space is so limited, the chances of reclaiming is low and one therefore hugs what one has more tightly. So one just doesn't let down guard or reduce speed. It's too risky.

But in crossing the roads particularly at three points that I have in the last week or so, I have a strange of urban humanity, something akin to kindness to strangers of the high variety. Yet it was so casual.

A recent assisted road crossing

I arrived just opposite to the DCC market in the dark from Gulshan 2 by rickshaw. Traffic jam level was high and I wasn't looking forward to crossing at all but had no options. However, in the last few months I had learnt enough to know that a simple ask changes the scene. "I need some help to cross the road," I said, my face clearly scared. I saw the buses rushing in and felt that fear that I didn't feel before.

The man next to me said, "OK, Come and move with me." He raised his hand as the bus on the strangely dark road came hurtling down the road. It slowed down as several of us made our way and reached the halfway mark which was a wall meant exactly to do that.

it wasn't a road cross so no gap. We all stopped and used that narrow space of the opening housing a lamppost to reach the other side. I guess not many are fat who cross the road this way. In the half dark, half brightly lit spots, we crossed over to the other side.

The person helping me by then had also slipped through the gap and took my hand and led me across. I thanked him but he was already moving on. He had done what came naturally to him, help a senior. Somehow the city seems so different after such a crossing.